amanda

Ficlet: After Love (Amanda, gen)

Title: After Love
Character: Amanda
Rating: PG
Summary: Amanda was married once before Sarek. It didn't work out.
Notes: Part of my ongoing ficlet obsession. Also, I decided that printed photographs still exist in the future because they are all over Gaila's dorm room if you look at hi-res screencaps.



Amanda closes her wedding album with a snap. Standing briskly, she snatches it from the table, marches to her closet, and wedges it behind a pile of heavy boxes which she will hopefully not move for several more years.

Next, she tackles the living room, pulling pictures off the wall and depositing them on the coffee table, stacked according to size. Without looking at them, she flips them over one by one and removes the photos from the frames. Frames on the left, photos on the right. Two neat piles. Every now and again she catches a glimpse of a church, a frothy white gown, her three best friends in identical lavender dresses, but she never lets them come into focus.

When all the frames have been emptied, she seizes the pile of photos from the floor and marches to the kitchen. Her hand pauses over the trash bin. She takes a breath, throws the photos in. For a split second, she sees herself smiling on top of a pile of banana peels and coffee grounds. She closes the lid before she can look at the rest of the picture.

There, she thinks. Done. She resists the urge to wipe her hands. Five minute break, then on to the packing. She'll come back in six months to a house that's hers instead of theirs. Bottle of water in hand, she flops down on her bed. Really her bed, now that she'd bought a new bedspread and changed the sheets this morning. She turns over, intending to look for a hair band in her nightstand drawer, and suddenly she is face-to-face with an old version of herself, who of course has her arms around him. This time she lets herself look. Not at all of him; that would be too much. Just isolated features – green eyes, stubbled chin, brown hair flecked with gold after the honeymoon in Tahiti. Her favorite picture of the two of them, the only one she had somehow forgotten in her cleaning.

She clenches her fingers tight around the frame, resisting the urge to caress it. She is not the kind of ex-wife who weeps over sentimental treasures. Her fingers clench around the frame again. She is also not the kind of ex-wife who hurls picture frames to the floor for the satisfaction of watching the glass splinter and crack. She flips over the frame to take out the picture. It crumples in her hand, and she throws it into the waste bin in the bathroom as if it were just another piece of trash.

She is the kind of ex-wife who moves on.
Great character piece, and I've never seen the idea that she might've been married before Sarek.

It would give quite a new spin to the ST V angle of him having been married before too. If they'd both past failures, maybe they were willing to risk more for something they really wanted, instead of settling for second best.
Oh, another lovely piece. I like her determination here, and just the faintest sense of over-compensation. *snuggles her*
That last bit sounds like a bit of "fake it till you make it," which is a sound strategy. :-)